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I’ve spent the last two days sabotaging myself. I ‘misplaced’ my food diary, calorie counters, etc. Skipped meals, made poor food choices, avoided blogging about it.
What it comes down to, I think, is that on some level, being fat is emotionally comfortable & attempting to find my inner skinny chick is scary. And I’m all about comfort & staying in my rut. I like it here. It’s safe.
Well too bad. I’m simply going to have to be scared, uncomfortable & getting skinnier. Slowly. Habit by habit & mouthful by mouthful. Choice by choice. Day by day.
Alcoholism runs deeply in my family. If two of my beloved relatives can achieve sobriety & maintain it, then I can reform myself too damnit. Starting today. Now.
Come to think of it, if I can quit a pack and a half a day smoking habit I can do this too. With enough persistance. patience & faith in myself.
I’ll be back later to update the remainder of my day. Accountability is a good thing.
Ok, the pig out continued after I posted last night & all day today. I guess I ought to feel guilty, but I don’t.
Tomorrow is another day- hopefully tomorrow morning will be less harried & off schedule. Because we all overslept I skipped breakfast & then ate a very large late lunch followed by a late dinner at McDonalds.
As we all know, skipping breakfast is bad. Skipping breakfast & eating lunch later than usual is a recipe for disaster. Learn from my example- be ten minutes later if it means you stopped for a yogurt & a banana. No one likes to be grouchy because they’re hungry.
I’ve no excuses for last night’s pig out other than a) I was tired & b) husband was in one of his nurturing “I need to feed you” moods. Who am I to say no to ice cream & haavarti & ham on crackers?
I hope this darn link works, I can’t figure out why technorati links won’t work here. Anyway, on Thursdays Technorati has a meme where people make a list of 13___________ whatever you want & post your list with a link to Technorati.Thursday Thirteen lists are fun to read. Many different themes & lots of times you learn about the blogger.
Anyhow- Following are 13 of my favorite foods. Not diet friendly at all, but yummy & delicious.
1. Ben & Jerry’s Chunky Monkey
2. Hawaiian pizza
3. Mac & Cheese- either homemade or Stouffers
4. Chocolate
5. Almonds
6. Pralines
7. Jif peanut butter (& only JIF)
8. Pace Salsa- we used to live down the road from their plant in San Antonio TX. You could smell the onions cooking for miles!
8. Bearnaise sauce- makes even Brussels sprouts taste good enough to eat
9. Coffee, coffee & more coffee
10. Popcorn
11. Jelly Belly jellybeans
12. Meatloaf
13. Spaghetti & tomato sauce with fresh Parmesan
SO- maybe next Thursday I ought to list 13 behaviors I plan to change in order to improve my health!
So- Husband made a DELICIOUS macaroni salad to go with dinner. Completely made a pig of myself. It was so yummy though. I have this all or nothing attitude about eating, so after dinner I made things better by eating the head off of Son #2’s Easter bunny. Solid milk chocolate. Another total yummy. I feel better now that I’ve confessed.
BTW- the horrible fat kid tv show was on TLC.
